I get up...and only this gets me down....

The furious pace of reformations continue, with - yet another - 80's stadium rock band treading the baords once again. Van Halen - one of the few bands to successfully survive the change of lead singer following the sdeparture of David lee Roth and his replacement by Sammy Hagar - are back again.

For a band mostly inactive over the past decade - save one tour in the summer of 2004 which was often overpriced, undersold, and critically reviled courtesy of the one man trackwreck that is Eddie Van *hic* Halen (a supremely and incredibly talented guitarist who has invented styles most guitarists can only dream of, latterly who has turned into a barely functioning alcoholic who is a mere shadow of his former self) - this certainly is big news. After all, the band whose only output in the last 10 years was three tracks for a greatest hits compilation in 2004, is back. Or are they?

Not really. its only half the band it used to be, and founder member Michael Anthony - who was only involved in the 2004 tour at the insistence of Sammy Hagar (who wouldn't play without him) and agaisnt the wishes of brothers Eddie and Alex Van Halen - is missing. in the 2004 tour he was paid a reduced rate, but this time, they've decided to replace him with someone even cheaper. After all, why hire a bass player when you can make them? Yes, thats right - Eddie van halens son is now in the band as a cheap as chips ersatz alternative, and one that fundamentally skews the power balance of the band in the favour of Eddie.

Obviously, naming the band after two of its members is not always the most democratic decisions - and Van Halen 2007 is only half the band it was in 2004. Literally. Their longest serving (and biggest selling) lineup of Sammy Hagar, Michael Antony (founder member, who had played with the band since their inception in 1974), Alex van Halen and guitarist Eddie - is now gone. Instead, they have replaced Sammy Hagar with the very man he replaced - David Lee Roth. Eddie Van Halens son Wolfgang, is now the bass player. Who is 16. Who was born 13 years after the band made their first album. Who recently was photoshopped into the official album covers of records made before he was even born. Absurd. ludicrous. And lets face it....patently shambolic.

its not the Van Halen, but its certainly A Van Halen. 3 of them, to be porecise. In doing so, they've mad esure that the bands dynamic is firmly skewed in Eddie's favour, that any democracy is a shambles. a band is a cohesive unit of four musicians = surely ? no? Obviously not.

Its Eddie and his son who is powerless and subservient, Eddies cohort, supplicant brother, and a oldtimer frontman who desperately needs the publicity. Bearing that in mind though, that replacing a founder member of the band with a much cheaper crony substitute, and one that is a powerless teenager at that, is hardly a sign of a strong unit, but one teetering on the brink of perpetual collapse.

I'd love too see Van Halen, but this isn't Van Halen. This isn't a band anymore than just a stadium filling solo project but a shambolic, barely functioning alcoholic who is aptehtic man riding on his own coat-tails. is a shambolic, money making machine. Eddie Van Halen has also recently had cancer fo the tongue, and had a third of his tongue cut off; and then apparently cured himself of his addictions with a method that he admits isn't exactly legal in America (widely presuemd by some to be smoking crack). jesus christ. Thsi man makes Oete Doherty look like a halfwit amateur when it comes to self destruction, doesn't he? All for the sake of a life destroying habit - smoking. Good God, I'm amazed this man can even step into a car without running himself over. Who does he think he is - a member of East 17? The key difference is quite simple though - Eddie Van halen had talent. A Tremendous amount of talent, but squandered and wasted away in a spectacularly public fashion.

This is crazy. This is insane. This is...5150!