One look, one simple look.....



Its funny, really. There was a girl Iused to really like, get on well with. That sort of random crush caused by someone acting nice to you. But I'd only ever see her at her work, in circumstances less than ideal. We'd never see each other outside work. But once, i did, and make a complete idiot of myself with a random act of flirtatious kindness. Asked her out, and she was so exceptionally kind in her refusal (saying 'I'm sorry, I'm not available at the moment') - it made me feel like someone apologising.

But today, I was walking back from the pub at lunchtime, me in my suit, and saw her at the bus stop, getting ready to go to work. I looked over and she looked back. She noticed me, knew who I was, recognised me. She'd not seen me in the suit before, I guess. I held her glance for a second, then looked away and carried on walking.

I looked back, and noticed she was still looking over at me. She moved her eyes away, quickly and guilitly, in that 'I've been caught looking at you' kind of way. that sort of 'I've been caught checking you out' kind of way. That glance held a little bit too long, to be merely just a look. What did it mean? Did it mean 'Why don't you talk to me now?'? Because if it meant nothing, it would have been a look away.... and it wasn't. It was a holding look, after I had turned away.

Its funny how things change, how what might have been.... but never were. But its the case for me that I'm the one not available at the moment. And thats just the way it goes.

Funny old world.